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Life sure isn’t easy. Life is hard. Life likes to throw curve balls at you. Just when things start going good, it makes it really hard. I however believe that when things get hard that you have 2 choices, 1 be angry and shut down, or 2 own it and let it make you grow. The second definitely takes more effort and isn’t the natural response. I know I am not the only one who has to battle daily to make the right choice on how to react to the things that happen to me. I also believe that happiness is 100% a choice. You have the choice every morning to wake up and be happy, or to wake up and just go through the motions. You have the choice to look at things in a happy perspective/the growing perspective that I just talked about, or you can make the choice to start your day on the wrong side of the bed and be angry.
Lately I have been on the angry shut down side of things. I sit and watch these bloggers and people that I only see their instagram lives and compare my numbers and happiness to theirs. What I am forgetting is to let that make a fire under me, let it make me be happier. I need to remind myself that I work 2 jobs, I don’t have the time right now to dedicate to my blog that I wish I did. I am doing the best I can and when I look at my life, I think I am doing a pretty dang good job! Blogging isn’t all happiness and easy like people think it is. It isn’t something that one day you can start and think that the “free” stuff is going to come rolling in. It takes headache, stress, hours of planning, hours of pictures, editing, writing, everything. Then on top of all of that think about comparing yourself.
Often times I wonder if it is worth it. Is it worth it for me to be so stressed out and to worry? People may think that I come across “full of myself”, but in all reality every picture I put up I am self conscious about. I worry about what YOU will think of it, how YOU will respond to it. Then I take a step back and think, I started this blog to build my confidence, not to let me worry of what YOU think of me! I have made my best friends through blogging and learned a lot about myself and other people. That is what makes it worth it. It isn’t about all the “free” stuff or money that you can make from a post, which in reality isn’t free or very much when you count how many hours it took me to get that post ready, or the mean comments that people write. I mean for the love, if you don’t like me or what I write don’t come back. It won’t hurt my feelings. There is no reason for you to voice your opinion to me and to break me down! It is the life long relationships that I have made. The confidence that I have built in myself. The way I have learned to not be afraid of putting myself out there. Those are the the reasons I blog and continue to blog.
I just want to thank you for being along on this journey with me. Thank you for coming back to read about what happens in my silly life, or what I think is trendy or my favorite looks. Thank you for being my friend. I truly have a special place for each of you in my heart. I appreciate your love and support more than you will ever know. You have changed the way I look at myself and helped me to not be afraid of people. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Now I’m going to go be happy and be happy where I am at in this journey right NOW, because whether I grow bigger or smaller as a blogger, right now will only happen ONCE!