Mom friends are the absolute hardest part of being an adult I think. I think that every mom wants and needs a good friend. Someone that you can talk to without being judged, will let you vent and ramble without thinking anything of it, will love you and support you no matter what you decide to do, will talk sense into you when you’re being stupid. Mom friends are so hard to find. They are something that everyone needs in their life. Zach often asks me why I don’t have friends to go to lunch with, people to call on the phone to when I am sad or frustrated, someone to make cookies for even when they don’t taste good when they are having a bad day, or pick up their little ones when they have too much on their plate… I think I have finally figured out why…
I put too much on my plate and I don’t make the time for it honestly. When I think about it, it scares me and overwhelms me. How do you find that person? How do you make sure they won’t burn you? I have been burned a few times in the past with people who I thought were my really good friends. Taking cookies to a friend and her telling me she is on a diet and how could I not know… friends telling me they wanted to make life plans together and then doing them without mentioning anything to us about them and doing them with someone else… Friends who you thought were your friends and then they talk badly about you behind your back… THE HONEST TRUTH IS I’M SCARED… and I am terrified to take my stinker little boy places with new people because let’s be honest, I am stressed out the entire time we are in our out of our house he is breaking things, hitting people, throwing things at people, etc…
Plus, between all of that, when I am I supposed to have time to have a friend between working as a nurse, helping my mom with my special needs brother randomly, blogging, answering emails, photo shoots, laundry, editing posts, cleaning the house, dinner (what is that?), social media shares, playing with King, networking, etc. I am supposed to MAKE the time for it. That is what. Why am I sitting here feeling sorry for myself not having friends when I am the one who isn’t making time for them? Another big thing is that the whole time I am with someone new I am anxious… I shouldn’t worry what people think of me, but let’s be honest I do, and actually it is none of my business what they think of me, but I can’t get that into my head for some reason. I hang out with someone new and come home and re-analyze every piece of everything that I said, did, King did, etc. and stress myself out that I said something that hurt their feelings, made them feel like I am judging them, King hit their little one, threw something at them, etc… So what is the best option? Be sad all the time that I don’t have friends, or buck up, put my big girl pants, and go and make some?
Photos by Roxana Baker
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