Who Am I Anymore?
Do you ever take a step back and look at your life. Who is this person living my life? Who is this person that has been sucked so far down a so called routine? Why doesn’t this person have time to do things that they like to do anymore? What do they even like to do? When did I get lost? When did I start to drift away into someone who just wakes up, gets ready, feeds the kids, cleans the house, makes meals, does laundry, and works all day long? Where did the spontaneous person I use to be go?
jumper || tee || watch || bracelet + here
I have realized lately that I am that person. I am someone living my life who I don’t even know anymore… I have filled my time with pleasing everyone else to the point that I am still myself somewhere in there…I am being myself still…but it has been lost in making sure that everyone else is happy, making sure everyone else’s life is easier even though I am making mine so much harder. I don’t know when I got so lost. When did I start caring so much about pleasing others that I don’t even know what I want or what is best for me anymore? I think as women and mothers it is so easy for some of us to get lost down this path… to not know who we are anymore because we are so encircled with pleasing everyone and everything else.
I am constantly moving my appointments with people to make their schedules lighter and mine heavier because I want things to be easier for them. I am always running here or there to make sure that people have everything they need the second they ask for it so they aren’t waiting on me. Late nights to make sure brands are happy with posts and social media shares. I am ruining my life to try to make everyone else’s life better… I can’t make everyone happy so why I am ruining myself? I am the only person who can control if I am happy and taking care of myself. Why am I failing at the only person that I can control?
“If you can’t make your life a priority someone else will” -unknown
This!! Why can’t I make myself a priority? Why am I being a priority for everyone else’s life and letting the people who mean the most to me down? I am literally loosing who I am, becoming unhappy, and not taking care of myself to try to make everyone else happy. I CAN’T CONTROL THEM OR THEIR FEELINGS. This isn’t going to be an easy change and I am going to start with asking myself when someone asks me to do something, move something, etc. “Is this going to make my life easier or harder?” If it is harder the answer is going to be no. I don’t need to give a reason why, it just isn’t going to work for me. If it won’t make things more hectic or harder then I am more than happy to help, but I can’t keep taking care of everyone else while I fail myself and my family. I am making my life a priority. I am putting my family before everyone else. I am making the change.
Who’s with me?
Thanks Dani! You are so true! We can only control ourselves, so there is no point in trying to please everyone else. Kindness and love? Yes of course but their is no need to give up our happiness just to appease others. I have tried and I developed anxiety because of it, not worth it!
Sending prayers and support your way❤️️
Oh Aubrea! I feel the same way!! It is so hard to make a change, but I feel like when I do I am so much happier so it is worth it!! XX
I’m so glad that you shared this. I often have these same feelings, I stretch past my limits to please others and make sure their needs (or wants) are met. I then think, it’s service though, so why am I not happy? I think there’s a fine line between giving and letting others give to you. There needs to be balance, but it can be so hard to find! Thanks again for sharing.
Oh Karlie, isn’t it so hard! I feel the same way, service should be good and a feel good, but when we are making our lives harder then it isn’t service anymore, it just just making life hard… maybe? Ha maybe I am totally off! There is totally a fine line and when I think we find the balance of it, our lives will be changed!
Wow! Feels LIKE ME! I am not sure where I “lost myself ” but absolutely understand what you say!
It’s a bit frightening to know we DO lose our ourselves! Yet very true!
I am so glad I am not the only one! It is so scary, but once you realize it and start making changes it is game changing!